I was so excited to date a fellow weirdo who also happened to be a baal teshuva.
This post dedicated to a wonderful weirdo, Rochel Spangenthal, who is looking for a fellow weirdo to marry and who wrote a beautiful post in Hevria, a home for weirdos, about this topic a few days ago.Hi, I was just your typical 19 year old Seminary girl in South Jersey (if you don't know where I mean, you are probably on the wrong blog).The funny reality of the way the shidduch system works now is that there are a lot of people, men and women alike, who are essentially saying the same thing: “There’s a part of me I want to express but I’m not ready to!” The thing that attracted me to my wife initially was her weirdness.The biggest message that always seems to be spread around the single people who do not embrace whatever project or idea they have is that somehow this is something they can package away and save until they are married.
They say things like, “I am laying low until I get married,” or “I’ll tell the world that I’m bipolar and this deep, incredible message I’ve learned from the experience after I’m married,” or “I’ll start dressing like the nutball I am after I get married.”This is a post about people that feel they have some mission, some goal, some G-d-given desire to share or give something to the world but are worried that this mission or goal will ruin their shidduch chances.I remembered how weird she was from high school (seriously, super weird).She was into painting and doing crazy stunts for school spirit.Through our discussions, I observed that almost every single person --from the very chassidish to very modern-- is pretty much the same thing. Kindness; generous, thinks about the other, warm, sincere, open home, honest, authentic, loyal, good listener/communicator. Stability; Emotional, physical, spiritual, financially. The next most important thing that all girls wanted (including the girls that call themselves "very modern"): 3.Yiras Shomayim; Majority of the girls said their requirement was the boy "must" daven 3 times a day and it would mean a lot if it was in a minyan.(No, not that kind of fun, get your head out of the gutter, JI, CJ, and the rest of the boys who come here with vivid imaginations).