One study of online daters found that most viewed each other as similar, and liked each other less, after than before their offline dates (Norton et al., 2007).The sites can put too much focus on physical attractiveness.Research suggests that those who are socially anxious (Green, 2001) or introverted (Amichai-Hamburger et al., 2002; Rice & Markey, 2009) feel more comfortable communicating online.
But this can also lead you to pass up on potential dates because with all those options, you can't help but think, "There must be someone better out there." Online dating sites can thus foster an attitude in which potential mates are objectified like products on a store shelf, rather than people (Finkel et al., 2012). Online profiles are missing vital information you can only glean in person (Finkel et al., 2012), so it can be difficult to know if you’re really compatible with someone based solely on what they have shared on a dating site.Research shows that people spend their time on dating sites searching criteria such as income and education, and physical attributes like height and body type, when what they need is information about the actual experience of interacting with and getting to know the person on the other end of the profile (Frost et al., 2008).(A score of 100 indicates respondents were completely satisfied; 80 was very satisfied and 60 was fairly well-satisfied.) Still, many users found the sites frustrating.In fact, when compared to other consumer products, like cars, computers and credit cards, online dating services received the lowest satisfaction scores Consumer Reports had ever seen, Gilman said.The same principle applies to online dating: The sheer number of potential partners creates abundant choice.
So if one dater doesn’t suit the bill, there are hundreds more who could be better.
In addition, when we read vague information about someone, we mentally fill in the blanks with specific details that may be incorrect (Norton & Frost, 2007).
For example, when you read in a man’s profile that he’s a movie buff, you might think that's something you have in common, but when you get to talking about movies on your date you realize that you’re a foreign film aficionado, while he’s obsessed with horror flicks.
Show that you're humble through a joke, a self-effacing story or a humorous anecdote. To make a strong first impression, use anecdotes instead of a string of adjectives describing yourself.
Never lie about your age or what you do for a living.
Thus, it is not surprising that shy people are more likely to look for romance on dating sites (Scharlott & Christ, 1995; Ward & Tracey, 2004). As discussed, one benefit of online dating sites is access to hundreds, even thousands of potential mates—but having all those options is not always a great thing.