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Maybe she’s trying to appear cool and go-with-the-flow, but in her mind she’s already thinking of ways to turn a relationship that’s really nothing at this point into something.

From that point forward, it’s not easygoing and natural, it’s her measuring if she is getting closer or further from her goal. Everyone recognizes when someone has an agenda, it’s just something our intuition picks up on and it immediately puts us off.

Guys typically don’t operate this way in relationships and he can’t fully understand what happened to turn this seemingly happy, cool girl into an unpleasant, emotionally-reactive, reassurance-seeking mess.

All anyone really wants is to feel OK, and most of us don’t.

But it’s there and it comes across, even in the slightest ways.

It changes your vibe and your energy and guys feel this.

When this happens, you are no longer in the here and now, seeing the situation for what it is.

Instead, your mind is focusing on what it be and that’s when it becomes a problem.

You become attached to this fantasy future and then you can’t help but stress over it and worry about losing it (even though it’s not something you ever really had! Then your fears and insecurities rise to the surface and seep into your interactions with him.

QUIZ: Are You Accidentally Destroying Your Love Life?

When you meet a guy who makes you feel OK, your need for that feeling becomes overwhelming and you latch on forcefully.

You may not even realize you’re doing it; it’s not something you express outright.

It’s so quiet and subtle you may not even realize it’s there.