The boyfriends and SOs who get praised the most are the ones who send sweet text messages every morning and treat their girlfriends like princesses.
After getting ready, I would pick her up from her apartment. I would compliment her appearance and mean it as we walked to my car. And if there was a spark and things went well on the date, she’d get flowers or a note or something she can actually hold in the next few days.
If you’re a male in your twenties, you may read this and think, “Wow, what a loser.” Well, okay. Today, a date is not really a date because there’s no such thing anymore.
When I was in my twenties and had a date, this is what I would do. Then I would hand pick the the songs I wanted to play and load the CDs into my six disc changer in the trunk. Okay, let’s start with actually using our phones for what they were invented for. If someone is asking you out via text, text them to call you and if they won’t, they don’t deserve to go on a date with you.
I would wake up early like it was Christmas and wash my car. Then I would go workout so I felt good about myself. We know we can swipe and find another prospect while our date is in the restroom.
But this process is what made dating fun, exciting, romantic, and fulfilling. But more importantly, It gave two people a real chance because effort was put into it.
It made the date a mini event, something to look forward to. Today, a date is a coffee or a drink but not dinner because what if they don’t look like their picture.
Then I would drive to the movie theater to buy the tickets in advance so we wouldn’t have to wait in line (this was before the internet). So dating just becomes a bunch of lottery balls boucing in the glass box. But women generally want to be asked out, and who ever asks the person out takes the initiative, makes the plans, and sets the tone.
And of course, dinner reservations were already made. Instead of creating a space for romance, curiosity, build up, foreplay, and flirting, we just want the punchline. Except the lottery balls are faces and the glass box is our phone. I’m going to speak to men because hopefully, men are still taking the lead these days. Or if you’re gay, I’m talking to whoever takes the lead.
Women will joke about getting angry when their boyfriends for taking too long to respond to a text, or if they forget about the anniversary of their third dinner date. A lot of people are truly happiest in relationships when they’re shown continual and unfailing TLC, and I understand that to an extent.
I mean, there’s nothing wrong with wanting to feel appreciated.
And we both know, without trust, you are building on sand. Don’t act surprised or like the other person is crazy if they want to know where this may be going or what you want, unless you both agree that the sex was just sex.