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I realized the only time I wanted more of a commitment from a guy was when he showed signs of flakiness or emotional unavailability.

In other words, I used to dismiss this as “pesky human nature,” until I realized it was because I am also the one who is emotionally unavailable.

We're at a point where dating has become a very loose term. It could mean you're going out for meals in public, or you could just be two Millennials, f*cking and texting. So, what do you do when you want sex, but you don't want feelings?

We think it makes us weak or that feelings lead to a loss of our freedom or independence.

Casual sex can be respectful, but it requires honesty, communication and the strength to walk away when you realize someone is unwilling to give you what you want.

We get along, we make each other laugh, we are interested in each other's lives, we can go out for meals in public and have things to say and wait… And, at some point, it either needs to progress or stop.

If the two of you are truly enjoying each other's company in and outside of the bedroom, I hate to tell you, but you both have the case of the feels.

This is called counter dependency, which I have written about before. If we go for people with whom we know it won't work out, it hurts less than putting ourselves out there with someone it actually might work out with.

There was a time when I actually used to spend hours trying to figure out what a guy's flaky behaviors meant.

If someone isn't ready to let you in, it's not happening. I have pushed someone away who I truly had strong feelings for; I have also had the same done to me. This is not always the case, but in my experience, when you have sex with someone too quickly, all logic and judgment goes out the window.

You both get caught up in the excitement and the endorphins, and all of a sudden, you think you know someone because you've been "f*cking and texting" for three weeks straight. You just think you know the idea you've created of this person. And, it may make you think you have “so much in common,” or that you have a good sense of who this person is.

Here are five things I've learned about casual sex: After a series of disappointments, I had no choice but to examine the role I was playing in all of this. I'd meet a guy, we'd hit it off and just when I started to feel like I could trust him, he'd turn into a giant flake.

I would then blame myself for being stupid enough to experience human emotions. Once I figured out why I was choosing them, my entire perspective changed.

But, this doesn't mean you have to stop living your lives and enter a serious, long-term, monogamous relationship. Before you can figure out what you want, stop calling it what it isn't.