Dating my boyfriend hasn’t magically made me okay with my weight’s fluctuations, but what his presence has done it make me feel beautiful in his eyes no matter what, and look at why I might be gaining weight. When I get bad news, I want to soothe myself with salt.In his case, I believe it’s genetic; he’s been heavy since a very young age, and didn’t slim down even when playing football twice a day. That’s something you can’t hide when you live with someone, nor would I want to.When you date a fat person, their size quickly becomes an “issue” for other people in your life.
We each try to eat a balanced diet and to steer our joint meals on an overall healthy path.
Just as he doesn’t get on my case when I stray from my overall healthy eating, I don’t try to tell him what to put in his mouth.
I can get so hung up on a clothing size that I’ll buy a less flattering but lower number to make myself feel better.
I’ve even shied away from attending events when I felt I was simply “too fat” to fit into any of my clothes.
In fact, he’s the one who looks at labels more closely than I do.
We do buy organic meat, and have each cut back on foods we found we simply couldn’t resist (his was ice cream, mine was cheese).
I have some super skinny friends who are considered really hot and always get hit on and then there are celebs who are super skinny, like Olivia Wilde and Megan Fox (she supposedly has a 23 inch waist!
), that are considered these huge sex symbols and are number 1 on every ‘hot list.’ Oh boy… I knew that sooner or later this question would come up and I would have to answer it.
But once we started dating, the kind of fat talk I’d regularly engaged in about myself, usually silently, wouldn’t cut it. When I feel like a failure about my body, that extends into other arenas, making me less enthusiastic about my writing, sure that, somehow, other people are making those same judgments.
Knowing that he’s dealt with actual discrimination because of his size has forced me to ask myself tough questions when I do worry about my weight: namely, what am I really worried about? It’s a vicious cycle, so living with someone who simply doesn’t let himself care about what other people think is a constant revelation.
The fact that he knows I have trigger foods, like potato chips, means he won’t leave them in the house, but also that when I do have a binge eating episode, he is kind about it.