Space in a relationship is key to long term success.If you struggle with being needy, odds are you probably lack self-esteem.Trusting that it's okay to feel insecure in one another, but also asking yourself why you don't trust the other person, is key.
We all long to be understood, supported, loved, and accepted. Yet, being overly emotionally needy —A person should be able to stand on their own, tolerate aloneness, and manage their own ‘stuff’ for a healthy relationship to exist.
How we go about expressing our needs has a lot to do with our personality and our attachment style — our style based on how we learned to relate to our parents and how emotionally available they were... There are 3 styles of attachment that Secure people present themselves as warm and loving and were most likely raised with caregivers that were consistently caring and responsive.
They have an insatiable and exhausting emotional ‘neediness.’ They truly are exhausting and relating to them becomes a vicious cycle. Do you look to your partner for constant reassurance and validation?
Are you looking for others to make you feel good about yourself — always looking outside ‘self’ for reassurance?
Begin to explore your anxious attachment style and start addressing how you can become less needy and clingy.
Learn to connect the dots and understand what it is about your attachment style and upbringing that creates the neediness in your relationship.Ask yourself, what do I need to do to become more self-reliant and independent?What changes do I need to make to get me to a better and healthier place?This will help you recognize unhealthy relationship patterns.Learn to sit with your anxiety and the uncertainties of life.Too much 'neediness' can have negative consequences.